well.. officially back to blog.. haven been blogging for like a week.. was lazy n also nth to blog abt.. life's been pretty much the same, it's either slacking at hm or go out to shop n slack..well monday.. went out with hamtaro haha after nt seeing her for a week.. we went to causeway pt.. shopped ard.. hmmz then took neoprints.. n we din realise tat the green colour chair is of some use only till e last photo den we realise.. omg.. i tink i'm so dumb..well den we went to have dinner n went to slack in mac.. hoho standard process..as for tuesday been staying hm for like 3/4 of the day.. monitoring tat dumb internet.. n went to new court play bball near evening.. well, den went hm ard 8 liddat b4 tat went lot 1 buy letter pad to write letter n also the notebook tat i wanna buy for sch.. ate dinner n tried goin online n it's once again down.. the dumb internet can drive me crazy.. call up starhub once again cuz i had called them in e mornin n they say they will help me monitor to see if any prob with our modem.. fine.. den wah tok to the technician tok until i damn pissed off n scolded them wad kind of shit service is dis.. first time scolding ppl through phone.. find myself so fierce.. =X n i is those kind dun like to make phonecalls to ppl i'm nt close with or dunno very well.. even if is close n noe quite well also will dun like or rather dun dare to make phonecalls to them.. tink bcuz i tink i dunno how 2 communicate with ppl or smth liddat..yesterday headed back to rgt, with eunice n hamtaro.. ate lunch in dere... hoho had one of my fav noodles back then when i was still in rgt n tat's curry chicken noodle.. yum yum.. =X chatted with the noodles stall aunty..hmmz den after tat went to look for mr kamar as hamtaro wanna look for him..hmmz after tat went to look for my dearest teacher cum special fren.. we were lookin for teacher during lesson time as in like 12+ to 1+ alrd.. was delighted to see my dearest teacher cum special fren in the staffroom.. hoho.. chatted with her in the office.. she had cut her hair.. so short but nt really beri short but compared to last time considered quite short le.. hahaz n she's still the same.. heez... i always enjoyed chatting with her.. =D den hmmz was like tinkin whether to pass the letter i wrote to her nt.. n i told her.. hahaz.. cuz i tink the letter was quite stupid when i read it again.. omg.. hahaz.. but in the end i give her cuz can feel tat she wanna read it.. hoho.. accompanied her down to canteen to have her lunch.. den she was like eating so fast cuz rushing for meeting so poor thing yea.. hahaz..oh ya n i saw alot pplz in sch too.. my choir juniors - jovene, agatha, wendy, jenneth, hoho but din happen to see tat vivian mei n angie mei.. other pplz whom i noe - copycat, nadia, zhuanying, kanagash, yanyan, yansghuang, cheryl.. hahaz.. so hmmz after tat headed down to jurong east cpf building for interview.. the job was being taken up alrd, so the person told us tat she will call us if there's any job for us or if tat job we went for gt ppl back out.. den headed down to causeway pt.. walk ard abit den went arcade play a round of daytona n a round of hmmz time crisis 2.. den went to take neoprint.. n went to mac to slack till 6 n have dinner at kfc den me n ham went to limbang to slack.. den changed place to slack.. hmm bought mcflurry n eat it under my blk.. chatted alot.. hmmz.. den went hm ard 11+..haiz.. having lotsa feelings n thoughts in me.. sighz... i really hate tat kinda feeling.. it sux simply.. it's basically one of the feeling tat i actually hates.. gosh.. it sux.. n tat is being left out.. it sux completely.. well somehow feels tat a similar history is gonna repeat itself but is it really so n will i able to prevent it from so.. haiz.. n tat actually makes me tinks alot.. lots of thoughts flowing into my brain juz like a spoilt tap.. somehow i would have this feeling tat i sux... i really do.. perhaps i'm nt a gd fren.. perhaps i mayb shouldnt have actually been planted into dis world.. sometimes i really wonder whether do i have real true frens ard me.. i really dunno.. n i really really tink at times tat i'm useless, i'm stupid.. a gd for nth person.. sighz.. sometimes i really feel tat perhaps i shld locked all the doors in me, throwing myself off to a place where there's nth but darkness which will surrounds me.. somehow i feel tat perhaps if i actually vanished one day w/o a sound, n once pplz who noes me knew abt it will they actually feel sad? i doubt so.. guess perhaps everyone would b juz so so glad n opening champagne to celebrate..perhaps i'm juz nt supposed to b planted into dis world after all.. everything juz seems so wrong afterall.. perhaps i really juz sux n really useless n nt a gd fren.. do i actually have real true frens ard me? well mayb i'm juz a sadist afterall..mayb i shld juz locked all the doors n throw myself into a place where only darkness surrounds me.. ~leaving w/o a sound.. Labels: thoughts n feelings all in me..
memories left behind..
