well... today, went out of hse kinda late.. then almost late fer sch.. if i left hm a bit later n i walked to sch a lil slower, then i'm surely late sia.. den first period was chi, watched ying xiong (hero), din kinda watched lah me.. was kinda readin up chap 3.1 of my hist.. den was erm pe, i din take pe today, told cher tat i'm not feelin well n so she allowed me not to take.. was habin a headache n stomache.. dunno wad e hell is wrong wib me sia.. ytd nite i din kinda eat my dinner loh.. don hab any apetite n i also chi bu xia loh, so onli ate like 1/4 of my rice nia or less than tat loh.. den back to today.. den after pe was cme, juz copy wad is flashed on e ohp loh.. den recess, went to find cher to ask some qns, which i dunno how 2 do de loh.. den yup after recess over, i den went fer d&t loh, 5 periods did folio.. draw n draw loh.. also not in e mood to draw loh.. juz dun like drawin dis kinda stuffs.. borin.. so was like slackin ard, tokin, so on.. den mr ras came in at ard 1.30 or so, she asked saheera to gib us the test as he got meetin, so i shun bian ask him when muz i return his bk back to him, n he so nice sia ask me no need, ask me keep it, after o's den return him..so gd sia, muz realli study hard hard fer hist n other subs too... so as to not let my tchers down.. den erm, after d&t, went to library to take the hist mock exam loh, so pathetic sia, first time i see mock exam wib no tcher de sia, n sumore onli 3 students take nia.. pathetic isnt it? after tat, went to canteen hab my lunch, den siayed in canteen tok tok, den after tat 4+ left sch.. took bus to lot 1, went to buy bubble tea to drink den walked ard, went hm at ard 5.. reached hm 5++ den bath liao, cum online loh.. well, i dun tink i will n i would want to change back to bcum e me in e past anymore, mayb e me pplz see in me now will last forever, i dunno.. dun feel like bcumin the past me e cheerful, happy, crazy, hyperactive n lame de me... it seems to me dat, pplz seems to dislike tat me... cuz, nowadays i tryin my best to change back but pplz always tinks i'm lame n so on, n seems to dislike it, n thus, i tink i'll not change myself back to the past me anymore.. mayb everyone will not b able to see my smile n hear my laughter so often anymore.. i'm might lock myself up, in my own world, where i'll not b tellin any1 anything nor trusting any1 again.. though, tat's wad i always tend to b beri easily, which is trusting pplz beri beri easily, but tat's me, tat's my character somehow, n pplz tend to see tat weak point of mine n attack it... i noe it's hard to change immediately, but no matter wad, i will n i muz chaneg myself to not trust any1 tat easily anymore, mayb i'll juz bcum a heartless person or wadever pplz might tink or feel tat i am... but i tink tat character of mine of trusting pplz easily has caused myself to actually b e cause of lotsa things.. to cause things which i dun wish n dun like, to happen, n so it's actually all my fault fer all things which r bad happens, due to my own character of putting too much trust in pplz n to trust everyone so easily..so nowadays i hab been actually reflecting on past things which happens n also everything tat happens which r not pleasant to b my own fault... it's all my fault tat things which r not pleasant happen.. it's juz all my fault n i'm the cause of everything tat happens.. dun tink the old me will b back anymore... all things hab chanegd even me myself.. [to pplz i used to hang ard wib in e past] sorry to u guys i tink u guys shld noe who u r, tat i hab not given u guys an ans till now, so now i'd like to tell u guys tat, i'm sorry if i made this choice, tat i dun tink things will b e same anymore tat we could b like the past again.. i'm sorry tat my final decision is to leave u guys... plz dont blame me fer it i'm sorry.. hope u guys will always stay happy like the past no matter wad, n u guys can still like e past, being happy, even after my decision.. tat's juz wad i wanna tell u guys, i will always remember the memories n the past we hab together.. though i choose to leave u guys, but i will still remember u all de.. no worries k.. plz don b unhappy or wad due to my decision k juz treat it tat i hab changed to bcum another person le, no longer the aili u guys noe in e past k... i'm sorry tat i made dis decision but wad is done can neber b undone n i hab already tink fer a long time b4 i came up wib dis decision.. hope u guys will see dis.. never put too much trust on any1 as nobody is perfect n u may not noe when e pplz whom u hab trusted might betray u... pplz do chaneg yea... so does things change... cherish everything n the times u hab now, b4 things changes n u regret not cherishing it.. be thankful of everything u hab now, b4 things change..
*no longer goin to b who i am in e past le* *no longer putting trust on pplz le* *no longer goin to tell pplz anything le* *no matter wad happens, i will n muz not go bang the wall* *i'm a bad bad gal* *i am so stupid*
